What gives

Leaning across the table pastor sandy asks me what is your biggest challenge? Without hesistation I say ‘myself’. I have been working on myself eversince. Two more weeks and I become a year older. The last year has been a defining year full of hopes and joy,dissapointments and killing depression,a year when I have had to redefine the values and priorities in my life...a year when I have had to disown many baggages,a year when I have surprised myself beyond my own understanding and also a year when i have withnessed the Hand of the lord first hand...It has been a year when I have seen life at its cruellest best and yet I have survived.It has been the year I really grew up. Three cheers for the miraculous human spirit that God has created !!

After running around from Kolkotta to Delhi and back,reminiscing and going back to the college days,meeting up with friends one had left behind long back…walking into the German embasy to see gracious people who made the visa procedure simple...i fly to Berlin for the ERS. The congress is at Messe Damm.The church guest house where i am to stay is five stations away.Walking on the street from the station to the venue there are scores of people from just everywhere walking with me....i meet a professor from NewYork based in Puerto Rico who walks with me as all of us are searching for the venue...he says he has many indian friends and they are very loyal...a picture of a warm hearted sardar comes to my mind. I get myself registered and am walking back and who do i see?Dr.Peter Davies walking along...casually.We plan to meet the next day during the congress and I walk on back to my guest house. The guest house is a decent arrangement with a furnished bath and an attatched fully furnished k...

Things are happening around us every day.We hear about churches being burnt,christians being killed in Orissa,in Mangalore and God knows where.We have seen many a TV channels flashing the news gallore.Many gracious Indians speaking against the violence.. In all that is happening around us how do we as christians respond? In the mayhem and confusion where do we go to look for the grace that apparently alludes us.There will be baggages and more baggages....pray that the lor will help as many or all to overcome so that they may get the crown of life...Amen.

The work is killing .I hardly find time to myself.The little time I get I often find myself slumped in front of the telivision.Got a cable connection just a week back and I am already having doubts about it.I haven't been able to find one intelligent channel that keeps me interested or teaches me anything of value.My lap-top lies neglected in one corner of the room un-touched ,beckoning me to write something beyond my own personal pain and struggles.The adjacent states of Bihar and Orissa are drowning and burning literally.One by the element of man's interference on nature and the other on quirkiness of man's nature.Orissa is burning..burning...and burning,whereas Bihar is drowning...drowning ...and drowning.How will the balance be brought,wil Orissa drown again like it did the last time and will Bihar burn once the public get their breath back.

Did two sub-total hysterectomies-am desperately asking myself,what next?The work has become hectic with every department running at break-neck speed.Everyone seems motivated and working to the maximum.The wards have never been so full.We actually had to turn away people come for billing since the HMS started rejecting the charts reading 'the wards are full...

What do you do when your sense of referance and one of your centers get suddenly pulled away from your feet?You lose the anchor that keeps your feet on the ground....you start to float......the delimna is whether to entertain the fulcrum at a periphery or completely anhilate it . Ideally God is the center of a christian's being .Thank God for it.No matter how far the prodigal may have gone he has ways and means of putting us back in the fold. Man's struggle and God's workmanship-the secret is to 'Let go and let God'-what a relief!

Its 2am in the morning and I am stuck at the hospital waiting for a breech baby to be born.Opened up another badly mucked up surgery case.Wh o will think I am a physician with an inclination towards res piratory medicine? This is what working in a deprived area is all about. I got in touch with myself today .I stayed stunned the whole day and by night I was laughing all the way to the bed and hospital. I treated myself to a luxury of a real strong jamaican coffee-that is saying quits to the night of sleep. Caeserian section beckons me to the the operation theatre-I can hear the anaesthetist dragging her sleepy feet to the OT door. I wonder how long it will be till I get a good night's sleep.