Women as individuals are such fragile beings.It does not take much to break us.Some do it publicly,some just give up on life and become another news item to be remembered
for sometime and then nothing.We have friends and families which surround us and take us along.
Depression is understated in our times.
One day I found myself feeling miserable for no apparent reason.Like I always do ,I started dissecting and analysing the reason .
Like a friend of mine suggests ,it could be hormones.
I picked myself from the bed and rushed to the church and by the end of the time in the church my mood was back to normal.
I have become a lot more introspective,and intentional in the way I do things.
Friends have confessed about having had periods of bad phases so I often find myself extending and bending a little more backwards to reach out in what way I can,
In the church is a lady who has been attending the service for umpteen number of years who always has these episodes of hysteria while the service is going on.Lots of prayers are going on for her.She speaks words like that of a woman possessed.
Our colleagues worked on her with fasting and prayer and has lodged her in the campus.She has calmed down and has sat through several services without making a scene.Whenever we see her she greets us and is normal .
Sometimes it feels like it is an attention seeking behaviour when she coughs loudly and keeps disturbing the sermon and at other times she has convulsive movements which would require a lot of strength ,short of an actual fit.If they were to present in the hospital thus we would label it FND.
It happens to women only ,so I with my head sense a personality issue and also unexpressed pain and frustration bottled up .There is no concept of therapy ,none whatsoever ,so we push our way through life suppressing,hiding,improvising ,and being pushed around all our life through.Do I as a doctor have time to really listen to all my patients ?
I would if I could but often I find myself bankrupt when I face such a sea of pain.
A lady was diagnosed to have enteric fever.She was on injectables as an out-patient ,she came back to us with persistent headache.Whenever we went up to her bed she would cover herself with all her beddings and complain of persisting pain.She would say as long as the paracetamol infusion would flow through the iv line she felt fine but when it was stopped the headache would resume.She had no fever during her inpatient stint.
One morning when we walked up to her we found her tied to the hilt with scarves and blankets and lying down ready with her complaint,The tyrant that I am I made her get up from her bed ,requested Simi to comb her hair ,dress her and just pamper her a bit in the sun out doors.She did just that.The old lady’s face lit up ,called Simi her daughter and said she already feels better.She was discharged the next day .
My juniors call it Madam’s sun therapy.
Is depression a disease of the haves ?As one of our colleagues observed,the poor just flow along with all events in their life whereas the rich seem to lose their bearing completely.
I remember my sister-in-law in Sikkim chuckling one day and matter of factedly telling us,’ what depression ?,Just put on one’s clothes and get on with life.That is the Sikkimese way.’
That is what most people do.
On the other extreme was a psychiatrist friend who told me that even a change of place causes some amount of grief and there has to be a period of healing.
There is no denying that there is a dead cold clinical depression which needs expert help but there is something more which cannot be clinically slotted but needs as much help and sensitivity.
I have tried to imitate a painting which my sister sent me which I think depicts today’s women through all strata of society.
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