Open the eyes of my heart Lord!

It was a sad day indeed for me.I have always knowingly or unknowingly protected my parents from the idiosyncracies of my life.They were insistant that they wanted to visit me.I am in my forties,period. I made arrangements to organise a visit for them in my place of work in winter last year. We never realise how ineffective the testimonies of our lives are to others.I always thought I was doing a good job but mothers being what they are,see beyond everyone else. We live sad lives isolated socially,spiritually and physically.Even great missionaries in the past had solid prayer and social backing from their home church,but we have nothing,nothing at all.Our brokenness has reached such a level but we put on coloured lenses and live in castles of our own accepting some,rejecting some, according to the measures we make with our feeble find.We live defeated lives,I think atleast I do.I always wonder how the Lord sees it all. This year I thought I would invite my parents over.My sister told me naught.She told me that my mother wept all the way back from my place the last holidays she visited me. My parents are God-fearing parents and have lived sacrificially for us all their lives. She saw something perhaps I don't myself perceive. Lord open my eyes to see what it is and the courage and grace to make changes where necessary.