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Showing posts from October, 2013


Muqarram would have been twenty three years old.He worked as a barber in notorius Muzzafarnagar.He was brought in by his parents barely breathing ,he had a tachycardia of around 170 beats per minute.He was being treated as tuberculosis by the local quacks. He had chronic rheumatic valvular heart disease with florid Mitral regurgitation,Aortic regurgutation,Mitral stenosis and presented with congestive cardiac failure and infective endocardites. Thus began our tyrst with this young man. Everyday we would hopefully go to his bed-side to see some kind of progress. Blood cultures were hard to come by and he had to travel a distance of more than 60 kms to get the echocardiography.He was hardly stable to make that journey. Everyday during the rounds I would chat a little bit with his parents.Mother was an unusually strong serene person who never got on our way.The father did all he was asked to without any question. Muqarram would give us a mute ,blank look everyday i

The ordinary bread.

I am in the church.The preacher is a muslim convert.He is preaching from Isaiah.He is reiterating the Word in full gusto.I listen,I pray ,I pray hard-Oh Lord please inspire me today. The choir sings beautifully.I pray to the Lord of my heart please Lord ,inspire me. There is a call for the Lord's supper. The lady's line touches the door but the men's line has just four people in it. Taking a cue from one of the old nurses I change into the men's line. I walk up to the Lord's supper and give a reverant glance at the supper before me. I see crumbs of ordinary chapatti ,hastily torn by the preacher into small pieces. It deeply touches my heart. How I forget time and again ,my master. You have called us to eat the ordinary bread in reverence,in the memory of you. When you are in it ,the ordinary becomes sacred.

So much water has....

Walking with Angel this evening in HCH made me realise just how much water has flown under the bridge.As I walked with her ,enjoying her eloquence and her take on what is happening in her life and that of her parent's and her little brother Joshua's,I was painfully aware of the shift in time. The joy of connecting with the child and learning what was happening with her filled me with a sense of awe . She talked about her music which seems to excite her and the piano exams which were around the corner.She also seems to be part of the advanced choir in school. I always relate Angel to the little child who would rush out of the door every now and then to give me updates on what was  happening ,anytime she felt her mother was struggling in any way when her dad was away in the field. I also relate her to a little girl who used to pray for us every night in a single breath.I have, on so many uncertain dark days taken comfort in the prayer of this little child. A child she is ,t

Getting back.

I am yet to get some kind of equilibrium in my place of work . I missed the sunday rest even as I travelled to jolly grant to attend the seminar on scrub typhus. Now that the weekend is approaching I am feeling the brunt of it. I struggled through the OPD today especially just before lunch when my sugars I think were hitting a low and then towards the evening when the cards did not look like finishing. The deadline for my first assignment with the fiction writing is also fast approaching. I have done the piece . Each time I read I find something more to edit. It has been an interesting week professionally,getting back to medicine as practised in the mission field.A week of work has given me a lot of food for thought. With age comes a sense of rest. The last week saw an onslaught of people coming in with all sorts of personal problems.I listened,I even wept with them but oddly enough  I had very little to say to them. Yesterday I had to take the night prayers for the nursing