In my weakness you take my hand and lead me on.

Every once in a while in my responsibilities I feel extremely over-whelmed and there are times when you feel out of your depths and unable to move further.This has happened to me in the past.During my tenure in Satbarwa,I used to have a group of officers around me who used to literally carry me.It was a team ,earnest and never questioned me but stood through times when I felt it was just too much.I have often felt like that in Lakhnadon.Yesterday was one such night.The government hospital was all into mucking up simple cases and pushing them into our hospital.At one o'clock at night one previous caeserian section case given a trial labour and failed was pushed into the casualty.Much like any other caeserian case we posted her.The bystanders were insistant that she be steralised.We started the surgery well enough with an inexperienced assistant.Her haomoglobin was all of 7.5gm percent.She was bleeding from all over and inspite of all our efforts medically even after she was sutured up one corner would just not stop oozing.It was serious oozing.We finished three vicryls trying to stop the bleed ,but to no avail.I had to wake Divya up,get Harshlata to scrub and we decided to do a sub-total hysterectomy.We asked the bystanders to give blood,none of them were compatible.
We continued with the surgery with my able assistants.
By the time we were done it was five in the morning.By God's grace the lady coped very well inspite of less blood.The baby whom we were much concerned about because the foetal heart rate when the mother presented was below eighty was hale and hearty and cried vigourously at birth. I lost heart so many times during the surgery.These stellar ladies quietly by their presence,just carried me along.
Thank you Lord Jesus for these blessings.
As I write this ,'Good shepherd of my soul....in my weakness you take my hand and lead me on' ..the Bethel group sings.

Comments

Image of Christ.

There is nothing more scarier than a heart that has hardened .I was talking to Mary the other day,infact weeping with her There is a deep restlessnessness inside.Thank God for it becuase it shows that I have not resigned myself to the way things are.I was telling her I miss the deep experience of seeing the image of Christ and the compassion of the Holy spirit which just used to overwhelm my heart when I saw the image of Christ in people ,situation and the creation. What is the image of Christ?It is a body marred and maimed to bear the sin of the world.it is a voice that did not speak in protest against God the father,who actually planned it all before the creation of the world,not against the people who maimed Him ,flogged Him,drove the nails into His hands and feet to satisfy their sinful nature.The image of Christ is a body broken to the utmost yet given to feed the very same people .It is a love that did not count the cost. I am a person who does not put too much v...

Gift of Life...

I realise I am a beauty junkie. Always on the lookout for the experience that brings tears of awe to your person. I guess it is all right because there is just one life to live and as would have it I would like to live it to the fullest.I have travelled a bit and I have a whole bucket list unticked yet.Some things I call it my short life,I still cherish forever. I have had the experience to meet up and get close to exceptional people ,some of them extremely rare species who stick out from the crowd. One such friend during my early years just looked across the bench to me and said something which has stuck with me forever. Having been to Auroville in Pondicherry, one suddenly exclaimed,' There is a glass crystal in Auroville, when the sunlight falls on it it reflects the light beautifully and it is breathtaking to say the least. You should see it.The crystal reminded me of you.'I have not seen that crystal till date but I remember the eyes of the person whe...

Just Listening.....

All of eighty and delirious ,the old Pandit shuflled for his Janeu(Sacred ceremonial thread according to hinduism which the brahmins tie around their person).Two devoted sons tried to wrestle him down to his bed.He had a diaper on ,and a catheter but was insisting deliriously that he wanted to use the toilet.Suddenly he picked up his thread and put two loops around his ear.The sons interpreted that he wanted to pass stool.This was a learning for us. Another time another man in his eighty came in screaming with chest pain.He had extensive anterior wall MI .My junior colleague managed him well.His ST elevation had reverted ,his pulse rate was well controlled and he was comfortably seated by the time we saw him for the morning rounds.By the afternoon he complained of chest pain and then went into a supraventricular tachycardia but his hemodynamics held, so we medically managed him.He was by nature a comfortable man.He shared that he was ready to die.We got talking to him one afternoon.He ...

What gives

Search This Blog